Questioner (Q): When I am not able to complete a task or meet a deadline, I feel the need to punish myself. I will maybe skip a meal, or if I have planned to do something with my friends, like going out or cycling or something, I will skip that; or if I made plans to watch a movie at night after work, I will cancel it. I feel the need to give up on things that I like to do in order to do things that are more important, like studying for a test or making up for the missed classes by watching the recordings. It does make me more productive, but I feel that punishing myself is not the right way of achieving this. Kindly throw some light on this issue.
Acharya Prashant (AP): See, punishment must be productive in nature. Punishment must be effective and corrective; that is the purpose of punishment, is it not? We don’t punish ourselves and others just to satisfy our revenge lust, or do we?
Q: No, that makes us sadists, I guess.
AP: Makes no sense either. I mean, you are punishing yourself or others, and that is bringing about no correction in the punished entity. Makes no sense.
So, punishment is good, punishment is a great thing, especially if somebody is honest enough to punish herself. But what is the quality, the dimension of that punishment? Ask yourself, “I have been punishing myself so often—has that resulted in correction, in elevation? If I need to punish myself for the same thing again and again, is the concept of punishment even working for me? Maybe this kind of punishment is just helpful to somehow placate my sense of guilt. I did a bad thing and I feel guilty; to get rid of the guilt, I punish myself.”
