Questioner (Q): I wanted to understand what exactly is guilt.
Acharya Prashant (AP): Guilt can be both a hugely liberating factor, liberates you from the little self, and guilt can equally be a great defense of the ego. What does guilt say? Let’s first of all look at it. Guilt says, “I am better than how and what I did”, right? Guilt says, “I am better than my actions”, or “I am better than my thoughts. I am better than the account I gave of myself on a particular occasion or on multiple occasions”, that’s what guilt says.
So, guilt says, “I am a resident of the 10th floor, but unfortunately and accidentally, I dropped down to the 2nd floor.” That you are operating from the 2nd floor is a fact, there need not be any imagination in this, but that you belong to the 10th floor is a presumption, is a declaration that only you have certified to yourself.
What is the fact of one’s life? – That one is operating from the 1st floor or 2nd floor; but what does one think about himself? “I belong to the 10th floor”, and this is guilt. “I am actually better, but I am not living as per my sublime self”, this is guilt. Now, this can work both ways, it can encourage you to really move upstairs or it can console you and comfort you into remaining where you are. You could say, “What a shame that a resident of the 10th floor is found rolling on the 2nd floor”, or you could say, “Oh, when I actually do already belong to the 10th floor, it’s alright if accidentally I happen to be spotted on the 2nd floor. These are minor accidents, they don’t count. My real place is anyway on the 10th floor, that’s my home.”
Guilt can be a great alibi against improvement. “I don’t need to improve because the faults, the foibles, the shortcomings, the lapses that I am displaying are just accidental; they are not me. They are happening despite me, they are not me. I’m far better than my performance. This performance is temporary. Very soon I’ll return to my standard elevation”, guilt could say that. Or, if one is honest, one would ask himself, “If I am so consistently being seen at and operating from the 2nd floor, do I really belong to the 10th? Or is the 10th merely an escape, a thought, an idea to help me stay comfortably on the second, and yet feel as if I am on the tenth?”
